List of Fears

fears-of-our-generation1-3 A Top 10 list is basically a personal priority list. Maybe we’ve been nurtured to this affliction. I’m sure there’s a named phobia for this, I just haven’t found it. The Letterman thing with his Top 10, the Top 10 sports moments every night on ESPN, Casey Kasum’s Top 10 songs for the week (look him up if you don’t know). Maybe it’s the Honeydo list at home that is actually a bottomless pit (MyWifesBrainNeverTurnsOff-phobia). Regardless, people like and make lists. So, to get people to respond on this blog, I thought I would post a list. Hopefully a list that most people have, but maybe, never physically written down……..the list is just somewhere in the memory bank (which may be closed for low funds at times) waiting to be withdrawn whenever one of the items surfaces. Items on this list come and go as time changes, but many items are probably permanent on the list (Sharpie-itis). It doesn’t have to be a list of exactly 10 items….it could be less or if you’re really neurotic, could be so many more.

FEAR. Another 4-letter word. I created my Top 10 list of fears below. Besides the usual list of suspects, i.e., Dentophobia, fear of the dentist (even though most are actually very nice people), Glossophobia (#13)- speaking in front of a crowd (even if the crowd is in their underwear and some should NEVER be seen in their underwear), Ophiophobia – snakes (the second most common fear). These same people like spaghetti…weird! I listed some of my not-so-usual fears to hopefully hear back a few uncommon fears that other people may have. I want to stay away from listing foods that are feared (I have already covered “Peaphobia” in an earlier blog) and tried my best to stay away from politics as I’m sure that list would be another bottomless pit list. My list is in no particular order. For those of you who have NO FEAR, good for you, Marvel is looking for another hero for their next movie…please go and entertain us. Here are my current Top 10 list of fears. Some are actual phobias, some have actually been given names by the voices in my head;

Interruptus Amungus the fear of losing more personal time to people I don’t know. This will be time you’ll never get back in your life.
a. Robo-survey calls. Really, you want to know what an over 60 year old white married working overweight male with an internal hemorrhoid and a few skin flaps takes for constipation? Can I send you pictures?
b. The religious wanderers that corners us at the mall, or sometimes between the red and white wine aisles at the liquor store or boldly ring my doorbell just to tell me that “God Loves Me”. My answer is always the same; “I know he loves me but why in the hell is he telling you”? Shouldn’t he be ringing my doorbell? Sending me an email? Instagram?
Excedrin-itis. The fear that Disco will make a come back.
I actually break out in cold sweats with this thought. And it’s a reoccurring thought. Picturing men with open silk shirts showing their shag carpet hairy chests with a golden spoon around their neck or women who for some reason have hairdos the size of tumbleweeds and earrings the size of basketball hoops dancing to music that can only be described as a constant aneurysm induced headache beat played by groups with no actual musical talent but possess a very nice synthesizer. Throw some tennis shoes in the dryer. Turn it on. Congrats, you now have a hit disco song with a beat!
Uphlosteredphobia. The fear that the carpet will eventually not match the drapes.
Not sure why this is a fear and it’s probably best not to expound on it. I know things fade with age, so I’m sure there are some Interior Manscape Decorators out there that have addressed this infliction. Will the lawn need dramatic yardwork? Should I pray to Sascrotch? Having two different colored eyes is called Heterochromia iridium so could this condition be called Pubis Chromedomeium (sorry, that’s actually just a drape issue)?
Kakorrhaphio-phobia. The fear of failure. I believe I have witnessed the last Chicago Cubs World Series appearance in my lifetime.
Since I’m big believer of historical data, the data shows that the Cubs win once every 108 years and 108 years doesn’t come around that often. It’s the same theory that people who live longer celebrate more birthdays. It’s now three years since that Championship and I still have game seven on my DVR. What happens when I have to replace the DVR equipment? I mean, there should be an upgrade sometime between now and 2124.
Outcasterdom. Selecting that one doctor where the other 9 of 10 doctors recommended something medically important or essential. It was the subject that was taught the one day my doctor missed class because of a toga party the night before during his residency.
Pulpless Disasterous. Noticing the toilet paper on the roll will not be enough AFTER the train has left the station. You try to hold a few cars back, but you don’t want to cause a derailment. The station master is in another room and can’t hear the cries for help!
Endless K Syndrome. The fear that there’s a Kardashian we don’t know about yet. Perpetuity be damned!
ABBAdabaoverdued. The fear there will be a Mama Mia 3.
On 8 released albums, ABBA recorded 101 songs. Mama Mia had 17 songs in the first movie. Mama Mia 2 had 18 songs. That leaves 66 more songs that haven’t been put to motion picture yet. Fernando, please make it stop.
Rigor Mortisfied. The fear that if ever I have to take that little blue pill, I will get the medical condition that lasts over four hours and I’ll be sitting in a far away outdoor bathtub somewhere staring at a mountain not being able to contact my doctor for at least 6 hours. Then I find out this was another class my doctor missed the day after his fraternity hazing night in college.
Eremophobia. The fear of being alone. I fear I won’t receive any responses to this blog. So please, relieve me of this fear.

More common fears;

Arachno-phobia – fear of spiders is the most common (not the Charlotte kind, but the ones that have the same type shag carpet hair on them that the disco men have in my fear #2 above). 48% of women have this fear as do 12% of men. The difference can be attributed to most men wanting to be Spiderman. Another fear (#9) is Aerophobia – the fear of flying (This is miss-named. It should be the fear of crashing – Splataphobia). Although, I’m willing to bet, most of us mainly because of our everyday work commute, would love to have the ability to fly. Even worst, imagine if you’re an Aerophobia bird! Acrophobia – fear (#3) of heights (or fear of being pushed?). Nyctophobia – (or StubaToe-itis) fear of the Dark is only the 35th most common fear. Surprisingly, Anthrophobia -fear of flowers is classified as a fear (but not on this link). Not sure if this is measured from the senders or the receivers perspective.

Others on the list of fears (link to list below);

Hippopoto-monstro-sesquipp-edalio-phobia (#26) – the fear of long words proving that sometimes you just can’t make this stuff up. What I thought would be more popular, Coulro-phobia -the fear of clowns, is ranked only at #88. They were sent in and apparently, found to be funny and not scary. Mysophobia – the fear of germs (#8). OCD people have elevated hand sanitizer to be a gateway drug. Claustrophobia – the fear of Santa Claus is #7 on the list (OK, it’s really about tight spaces). There’s Gephyrophobia (#41) the fear of bridges no matter how large or small. Coincidentally, very few if any Gephyrophobias are dentists. 8% of Americans have Paraskevidekatriaphobia – the fear of Friday the 13th which is different than Triskaidekaphobia – the fear of the number 13. Triskaidekaphobias never buy anything in a baker’s dozen.

Look at the list from the link………you’ll find other fears that will surprise you. Remember, these are the 100 most common fears. In the meantime……respond with those odd fears you have. Name them if you want to. I don’t mean to offend anyone with these actual fears but just getting people to list and talk about their fears, sometimes, you’re able to overcome them.

https://www.fearof.net/